a lot of my rather liberal buddies love to slam bush. a fair number of them use a word i hate, which is 'hate'. i don't hate the guy, i'm just embarrassed that he is the one guy that millions of people in our country decided was the best we could find to represent the most powerful country on the planet. it's like my fly is open and everybody in the other countries in the world are laughing at me. I don't want to kill my fly, or throw away my pants, i just want to zip it up.

and being a mac guy from way back, i usually don't dig things pc. and typically i don't make fun of people, even way easy targets like our prez.

but i saw this and well, it made me smile.

posted by bluematrix at 09/30/05 07:54 | link | comments (2)

sometimes pictures speak louder than words.

what if you saw this coming towards you? would you wonder if the end is near? stop and take a picture? pray? marvel that something can be so beautiful and so deadly at the same time? all of the above?

(thanks allan for sending this shot of katrina over mississippi.)

(oops. glad i'm not running a news show or magazine here because my source for this was incorrect in telling me this image was from Katrina. It turns out this image is actually from a series photographs of tornadoes and other extreme weather phenomena taken by storm chaser Mike Hollingshead in Nebraska and Kansas during the summer months of 2002 and 2004. Thanks for setting me straight.)

posted by bluematrix at 09/26/05 14:56 | link | comments (5)

i wrote this this morning, first one in awhile...

what a beautiful mind they have
as buff and sculpted as a bodybuilders
from lifting and exorcising
all those noble books
pumping and flexing their greying matter

yet on the other hand
relentlessly pounded by those same
often conflicting voices
they worked so hard to digest
becoming quietly unsure
on the very best way
(not just any way will do you know)
to exploit
all that bottled up knowledge
until they are unsure
of who they are
and where they should
be

posted by bluematrix at 09/21/05 08:00 | link | comments (2)

vegas chicks part 2

'wheech cheekin woodchew like seenyor?' the mexican teen asked me as we both peered into the cardboard box where a dozen or so mottled baby chicks cheeped up at us.

'it doesn't matter.' they all looked the same to me.

'did jew wan sum food too?' i got the distinct impression he wasn't very happy with me.

'no thanks.' i replied cheerily. he reached in and picked up a small creature and put it into a small cardboard box that someone had punched small holes into. so here was this drunken americano who had just bought this wicked looking slingblade, who didn't care which chick was chosen and didn't want any food. i'm sure visions of some satanic animal sacrifice was going thru his head. his expression was a mixture of sadness, distrust and resignation as i gave him the dollar and turned away with my package.

'dude, i ask you again, what are we going to do with a chick.' jeffe, still videotaping, was zooming in on the cardboard box as he asked this.

'jeffe, please, what do you mean what are we going to do with a chick...this is vegas! and anyways it's your fault.'

'how is it my fault?' he turned the camera off and we slowly began making our way back to the parking lot.

''you said it was better to have one great weekend than to spend your life in a cage. so i-'

'i thought it was a hypothetical question.' he laughingly objected.

'amigo, we just slammed a bottle of tequila and we're in vegas, no question is hypothetical.' i was feeling pretty damn good now. 'here, say hello to wilma.'

'i can't believe you bought a fuckin chicken.'

we got to the parking lot and put wilma in the back seat and headed to the hills outside of town to punish the jeep with some serious off roading. after failing to climb a sharp incline we backed down and got stuck in some sand. jeffe was furious to discover our jeep was not 4-wheel drive (either that or we broke it). when we finally got unstuck he mercilessly drove the brand new vehicle on an deeply rutted service road we found. the sun was going down and it was getting colder so we decided to go back to check in our hotel. i noticed the car handling oddly and we stopped to check - flat tire. jeffe got really upset again when we couldn't find the lugnut key to get the wheel off. after an hour of swearing and wondering how we were going to get back to town, we finally located it under the seat and with me keeping wilma (in her box) warm from the chill night air under my shirt we started back to the hotel.

my plan the whole time was to let her loose near the big fountain in the lobby and let the hotel staff figure out what to do with her, but i forgot to take into account that vegas hotels had security cameras everywhere. lobbies, elevators, hallways, hell they probably had one in our hotel room. we stashed wilma in the room, left to grab some food in one of the hotels restaurants, and decided to call it a night. well wilma was one loud bird. if there's one thing i can't stand is noisy mexican chicks in your hotel room in the middle of the night. we gave her some bread from one of the sandwiches we brought back, shut her in the bathroom and turned the fan on.

the next morning we still hadn't figured out what to do with wilma. so we took her with us when we went to get a new jeep from the rental company. jeffe gave the woman at the counter an earful about how unhappy we were with the jeep. the apologetic woman came out with a new set of keys and to inspect our returning jeep. she had given us a shiny new vehicle with 600 miles less than 24 hours before. and we returned it with a thick coating of sandy desert crust over every single surface inside and out, and a doughnut on the back tire. her eyes widened but she said nothing. even when she heard wilma cheep in her box in the back seat. i turned my head and coughed to keep from laughing out loud and jeopardizing our deposit. somehow she gave us the keys to yet another shiny new jeep and we drove off.

'we are not taking wilma to bryce canyon with us.' our amazingly beautiful destination lay 3 hours northeast of us and it was a strictly no chicken affair.

'i know, i know, but we just can't leave her by the side of the road.' we were on the freeway nearing the outskirts of vegas. then we both saw the sign at the same time. i knew it was perfect.

'no way.' jeffe said.

'big time way. it's perfect. turn quick before we miss the exit.'

we pulled into the parking lot, jeffe got out the camera and started filming as i got wilma out on the jeep seat began telling her some long story about how it just wouldn't have worked out between her and i. then i gently put her into her little box and walked towards the kentucky fried chicken restaurant. i walked into the mens room and went to a stall, luckily no one else was in there. then i opened the box allowing wilma to become a free ranging chicken and walked out past the unsuspecting patrons and back out to the jeep.

for the rest of the day we pondered the many different scenarios of what might have happened in the kfc after we left.

only in vegas.

posted by bluematrix at 09/16/05 15:23 | link | comments

one more vegas story

our hotel room wasn't ready yet. so we decided to take the rental jeep out for a spin. as we were near the outskirts of vegas, we saw a sign telling us a giant mexican market was going on. the tequila bottle was already 2/3's empty and we'd been in town less than an hour and a half. jeffe and i looked at each other, smiled, and i pulled a u-turn and then i was paying a dollar to park in what looked like a giant dusty parking lot for a refuge camp. the rusty green corrugated sheet metal went on for hundreds of feet, blocking our view of what lay inside.

we poured the rest of the tequila into the rest of the margarita mix and refilled our glasses. it was hot and dry and windy and i was quite buzzed as we walked by the fat woman with one eye looking like something out of a star wars movie guarding the entrance. the change crossing the threshold was startling. one minute you're in a parking lot in vegas and then next you were in a bustling mexican village. stall after stall of dark skinned people selling damn near anything you could imagine buying in a small mexican town. there were not many americanos.

touristy crap like velvet paintings of bullfighters and plastic cactus'. everyday items like socks and detergent. one stall had nothing but bras hanging everywhere. we sipped our drinks and walked the long crowded paths nodding and smiling as we were loudly encouraged to stop and purchase things. about every fifth stall was selling food and we sampled several very authentic tasting dishes.

about halfway thru i saw a grizzled old man selling knives of every description. from plastic steak knives sets made in china to genuine imitation civil war swords to some pretty well made pocket knives. for some reason i've always had a thing about knives. something about carrying one made feel tough and cool, it probably came from watching the knife fight in west side story as a kid. not that i would know anything about using one in a fight, and not that i ever got into situations where i would need one, but nonetheless, i had a thing for knives. i picked up one and it felt very balanced and fit my hand well. with a flick of my wrist, as if i'd done it my whole life, i snapped it open and heard it lock with a very satisfying click. 'how much?' i asked. 10 bucks the white bearded man said without looking up. i closed it by pushing it against my jeans then snapped it open again. my hands registered something primitively satisfying and reassuring about the action, like fingering rosary beads or smoking a cigarette. as i reached into my pocket for my wallet i noticed a teenager with close cropped hair and very dark eyes working in the stall filled with small cages next to the knife merchant watching me. jeffe made some comment about how was i going to get that on the plane, but i told him i'd figure something out. i gave the old man my money

we walked towards the stall where the teen was still watching me, and i turned to jeffe. 'jeffe, i have a philosophical question for you.' he told me to wait as he fired up my dv camera had been using, pointed it at me, and told me to continue. 'would you rather spend your whole life safely locked inside a cage, or would your rather have one crazy fun filled weekend where you let loose, but then checked out afterwards?' he thought for a few moments and then said he would probably choose the party weekend. 'so be it.' i said, and while he was still filming i approached the teen with the various rodents, lizards, and birds stacked in cages around him. there was a cardboard box with mottled brown baby chicks in them. written poorly with a magic marker on the box was the cost - $1. 'i'd like to buy a chicken', i said to the teen.

'what the fuck are we going to do with a chicken in vegas, tim?' jeffe asked, but kept taping.

posted by bluematrix at 09/12/05 09:53 | link | comments (2)

food and sex.

though people in modern societies are very discreet, an exchange of resources for sexual access is still an important part of the interactions between men and women all over the world. From "Miss Manner's Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior":

'There are 3 possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. it is customrary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. as the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. when the affection is the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. under no circumstances can the food be omitted.'

'askmen.com' lists 11 libido increasing foods:

Celery
While it may not be the first food that comes to mind when it comes to sex, celery can be a fantastic source food for sexual stimulation, as it contains androsterone, an odorless hormone released through male perspiration that turns women on.

Raw oysters
This is one of the classic sexy foods. Oysters are high in zinc, which raises sperm and testosterone production. Oysters also contain dopamine, a hormone that increases sexual fun.

Bananas
Bananas contain the bromelain enzyme, which is believed to improve male libido.

Avocado
The Aztecs called the avocado tree ahuacatl or "testicle tree." While avocados can indeed look like that body part, they contain high levels of folic acid, which helps metabolize proteins, thus giving you more energy.

Almonds
Almonds, as are most other nuts,are a prime source of essential fatty acids. These are vital as they provide the raw material for a man's healthy production of hormones. Additionally, the smell of almonds is purported to arouse passion in females.

Mangoes, peaches, strawberries
What can be more fun than sinking your teeth into a drippy, sticky-sweet fruit? Probably doing that as a prelude to (or during) sex. All of the above fruits and their shapes, textures and succulence are erotically suggestive and can be fun to use.

Eggs
Although not the most sensual of foods, eggs are high in vitamins B6 and B5. These help balance hormone levels and fight stress, two things that are crucial to a healthy libido. Eggs are also a symbol of fertility and rebirth.

Liver
A good source of glutamine -- a cellular fuel for your immune system -- liver may indeed increase a slowed-down libido

Figs
These are high in amino acids, which are believed to increase libido. They can also improve sexual stamina.

Garlic
Yes, you might need to stock up on some extra breath mints, but it'll be worth it. Garlic contains allicin, an ingredient that increases blood flow to the sexual organs. As such, it's a highly effective herb for increasing libido.

Chocolate
Aside from the fact that chocolate is the surest way to a woman's vagina, chocolate contains theobromine - an alkaloid - which is very similar to caffeine. It also contains phenylethylamine, a chemical believed to produce the feeling of "being in love."

me, i'm a chocolate covered strawberry man from way back.

posted by bluematrix at 09/07/05 09:18 | link | comments (2)

one of my first entries this year, was my attempt to get my brain around the indian ocean tsunami. i couldn't believe the way the death toll grew and grew. it made me feel very funny about water, a thing that i've always tried to live, work and play near, a thing that my own body is mostly comprised of. it was devastation on a scale that was hard to fathom. one of the few things that made me feel a little better was a selfish thought...it least it was on the other side of the world.

i live a mile from the river that, if one were to throw a stick in its waters, would end up in new orleans in a couple days. in fact, earlier this week, we had a hard rain that was the outer edges of katrina soak our yard with a much needed rain. (now our weather is mild and dry and warm and beautiful and i feel a little guilty.)

when i lived in houston a few years ago, i would sometimes go over to new orleans on the weekend to eat the best food in the world and walk down streets that, unlike most other american cities, ooze with history and unique personality. just last weekend, i went out with friends visiting from new orleans and we laughed and danced as we ate on the patio of a cajun restaurant here. (i haven't heard if they are ok yet)

and i find myself, just i did at the first of the year, glued to the television and cruising the net for images to try to understand the suffering of those inflicted by the power of water. i find my horror growing each day, just as it did with the southeast asian disaster. the united states gets pounded every summer with hurricanes and tornadoes and while things get blown around a lot, the damage is usually confined to a small area. but this is unprecedented. new orleans, the port that handles a fifth of all goods entering the united states is no longer a functioning city and won't be for a quite awhile. what gives?

yes, some will wonder how i can compare the loss of a thousand dead here with the 200,000 washed out to sea in asia last christmas. and it straight human loss terms, there is no comparison. but the hard fact is its all about proximity. for instance, if you have a family member die in your hometown, you will be much more affected by that than you would if you just read about countless souls being slaughtered in the major genocide episodes that go on every 10 or 20 years. (stephen pinker has a fascinating explanation of why this is, i'll have to remember to blog about it sometime.) new orleans shares the same river that i live near and this disaster, like 911, is just a little to close to home for me.

i mean c'mon, major metropolitan areas just don't 'close' and have bodies floating around the downtown streets for days on end. i tried to imagine st. louis 'closing' due to disaster. not just the immediate dangers, but the days and weeks that would follow. no possessions, no job, no business' open to get jobs from, no cars, no house, no way to make money, no stores open to spend the money in even if i had some. yes i have good insurance i remind myself thankfully, but still, the economy would be trashed for a very long time.

big american cities just don't 'close' for a months at a time.

cities a few hours away from me just don't have stories that read "We have individuals who are getting raped, we have individuals who are getting beaten, we have tourists getting preyed upon in broad daylight downtown." and "An old man in a chaise lounge lay dead in a grassy median as hungry babies wailed around him. Around the corner, an elderly woman lay dead in her wheelchair, covered up by a blanket, and another body lay beside her wrapped in a sheet."I don't treat my dog like that," 47-year-old Daniel Edwards said as he pointed at the woman in the wheelchair."

the weatherman just informed us that more hurricanes are likely in the near future. i've always dreamt of living on the coast...now i'm not so sure.

posted by bluematrix at 09/01/05 22:35 | link | comments (2)